LAST UPDATED: 1/11/2023
To be clear if you deal with an addiction or more than one addiction there is no magic solution to it.
Addictions are basically different ways people act out their frustration, anxiety.
Long term addiction indicate a faulty coping mechanism after trauma especially child trauma (failed parents, failed foster parents) but it could well be trauma that happened later in life e.g. a war trauma.

But it could well be the overall disappointment with the society and very limited set of roles we can play in it. This impacts the men the most as every man strives to be some sort of a pioneer but this is not always possible for every man to be a flashy pioneer until he understands and defeats his pride to become a pioneer in simple matters.

Just so you know at the end of the day wherever you are you are not missing on anything.
Lowering your expectations is key here so work on your humbleness. Occasional attractions and distractions improve the mood but only temporarily but humbleness will allow you to long term manage through life.

You either quit the addiction, take it under control and at least reduce the number of episodes or you let it wear you down, destroy your life and even kill you. Ideally you want to outsmart the addiction.

Child trauma or other serious traumas made you a faulty human being. Imagine an electronic device with faulty components that cannot be fixed. It is a hard reality but in that sense you will remain incomplete for the rest of your life. So far you don’t tolerate that state in your life and you deluded yourself that something or someone can provide a fix. There is no fix let alone a quick fix. You and only you is a fix. You are the captain, you fail in your duties as a captain the ship is going down. Looking for easy solutions in the outside world won’t work. What many people do is to keep themselves always preoccupied with something, with work, with some activities, with hobbies to stay away from hard questions. This is quite popular however once your are no longer part of some group or an association and you start to decline again.

We are the new generations after generations of parents and grandparents who already carry intergenerational traumas from war, poverty and general degeneracy the oligarchs put on them. We are generations of post-industrial reality that is heavily commercial. It is apparently Rockefeller who came up with the idea of a system where people themselves pay for their own demise. Though I think this system is much much older than Rockefellers themselves.
Degeneracy is the most successful way of depopulation because it prepares the subjects to final extermination with alcohol, drugs, homelessness and war. Once the subjects are degenerate enough then it’s easier for them to accept their ill fate.
Once they traumatize, degenerate, invalidate human beings by the hands of their own parents or other degenerates then it’s easier to fit them into their existing and future spoil systems and war machines to redirect the anxiety and anger towards other people like Mike Tyson use to do by transferring his internal pain onto his boxing opponents by beating the hell out of them.
It is the easiest for the parents to abuse their power and move their trauma onto their children.

Quitting addictions isn’t easy right? People promise that this is the last time they do it, that they will quit it by the end of year but they keep relapsing. It is because quitting the addiction isn’t fixing anything really if you don’t understand the underlying root cause.

People dealing with addictions say that everyone has its own hard bottom and have to hit that rock bottom at their own accord, on their own terms. Of course there is a high risk that they die unexpectedly while they hit that rocky bottom so well before they manage to engage in a proper recovery. This happens to many drug addicts, alcoholics and others.
Start with cutting down the frequency of bad episodes e.g. drinking, drug use, pornography, television binge watching etc.
You also have to accept that relapsing is part of the process but small achievements should eventually cumulate into a big achievement however state of continuous relapsing you tolerate is a slippery slope that eventually leads to death anyway (e.g. a car accident, overdose, cancer, heart attack or a suicide).
Being unhappy after relapsing isn’t great but still better than if you don’t feel any remorse.
The worst is if you rationalize the addiction and keep making the excuses.

These are the things I believe you should seriously consider while dealing with your addiction:

1. fully engage your intelligence in the recovery process. If you don’t, you simply won’t make it. Also no one is going to do it for you.
All the people even the addicts have free will and the recovery process has to be their journey. For some people it takes quicker. A sudden change, a tragic event in life can become an important trigger, a wakeup call to take drastic measures however for most I believe it is a long process that is why it’s so important to employ your thinking and intelligence into finding a way, a unique way because for every person it’s different. Some will hit the shallow rock bottom fast while some have to sink much much deeper to hit it but that depth can also crush them.

2. give a testimony – join Alcoholics Anonymous or DAA (Drug Addicts Anonymous) or similar organisation where you can listen to people’s testimonies but what is more important share your own story.
The same applies to pornography and shopping addicts.
Anytime you say something out loud there are witnesses who can verify your perseverance. It is the same with confession. If you do not confess your sins you just rationalize them under the blanket of privacy.

3. do not rationalize your addiction – if you do that it means you still haven’t fully engaged your intelligence and the risk of failure is much greater.

4. convert your unhealthy urges into healthy activities and behaviours

5. develop ability to think twice or even three times before taking any action that proves your weakness

6. if you are a male be a proper man or if you are a female be a proper woman – people have different starting points but never assume that it’s too late for you to make a turn even if you think that your small or big victories won’t directly translate into an interpersonal success. You have been created in the image of God so try not to disappoint him and you only disappoint him if you work towards demise.

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